Joyce's Jabberings

I am so not maternal

2011-05-25T22:54:00.000-05:00

The Little Kitty whose name has morphed into Taki is doing as well as can be expected. Her bodily functions seem to be working. I hate that during the day, her meals are constrained to my schedule, but in the evening, she snacks at will.

This morning, there was a large bowel movement in front of one of the bathroom doors: the evidence indicates it was from Taki. She has really objected to my "helping" her recently, but she needed to do this.

I am putting her in the litter pan when I think she might be ready to pee or poop, with moderate success.

Taki has taken to wandering through the house, trying to find me, when I am not in the computer room. I will move her about, to decrease her stress, from time to time. Other times, I keep her enclosed in the computer room.

She has bonded to the towel that I use when I feed her: I am guessing the formula she spits out iand s drooling onto the towel is comforting to her.

Severe Weather

2011-05-24T22:56:00.000-05:00

This has been a season of severe tornados: Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Joplin, Missouri, Minneapolis, Minnesota, the Oklahoma City area, including El Reno. Severe storms in the Dallas area, and so many areas in the south mid-west.

This is devastating. There are no words to describe how incredibly horrific this has been. We are grateful that there is a network of volunteers and emergency aid agencies who are able to respond to help: National Guard http://www.nationalguard.com/; American Red Cross http://american.redcross.org/site/PageServer?pagename=ntld_main ; Salvation Army http://www.salvationarmyusa.org/usn/www_usn_2.nsf, FEMA http://www.fema.gov/; and the Department of Homeland Security http://www.dhs.gov/index.shtm.

The TV broadcast talked about hope and "we will be better." That is the human condition: that we will be better. We can only hope.

Volcano in Iceland

2011-05-22T23:01:00.000-05:00

Last year, a volcano in Iceland erupted, and that eruption interfered with air travel for many parts of the world. This year, another volcano http://www.herald.ie/breaking-news/world-news/iceland-volcano-wont-cause-chaos-2654462.html is erupting, and the concerns are present that the same problems will occur.

Well, that may be true. But no one controls those volcanoes and their eruptions.. As human beings we sometimes seem to act and think as if we control the universe and the natural events on the Earth. But we occasionally or repetitively and consistently need a come-uppance to remind us that we do not control nature, and we need to learn to prepare, adapt, and otherwise be flexible about the adversities that weather heaps on us.

Click it or Ticket

2011-05-22T22:46:00.001-05:00

"Click it or Ticket" is the catchy national phrase used to encourage people to use their seat belts. I am a habitual seat belt user. Sometimes, when I purchase gasoline at the Murphy gas pumps in the Wal-Mart parking lot, I think I will not buckle up to drive from the pump to the parking spot I choose. Uh-uh. By habit almost always I buckle up without realizing it. In some respects that is good, because I automatically buckle up. But, on the other hand, am I paying attention to what I do? I think not.

Locally, we have been advised that the funding to have police officers patrolling for seat belt compliance has been decreased http://lubbockonline.com/crime-and-courts/2011-05-21/click-it-or-ticket-campaign-lose .

According to this story, the seat belt usage in Lubbock has decreased. Why? I know seat belts are not especially comfortable, but the human damage to vehicle users who are using seat belts is so overwhelmingly less than the human damage to those in vehicles who do not use seat belts. I know this is not 100% true, but the percentages do favor seat belt use.

Hercules Poirot, Agatha Christie, and David Suchet

2011-05-22T22:31:00.000-05:00

I am a fan of Agatha Christie http://www.agathachristie.com/, and especially her detective Hercules Poirot http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hercule_Poirot; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hercule_Poirot. Although other actors have played Hercules Poirot, I most identify him with the portrayal by David Suchet http://www.famous-pages.com/david-suchet/. Those are great shows.

I also enjoy the Miss Marple shows, but not as much as the Hercules Poirot shows.

Baskets

2011-05-21T20:07:00.000-05:00

I love baskets. Over the years I have accumulated a lot of baskets. Many of them are unique, and gifts from people who know I like baskets. One person even gave me a framed picture of baskets that says: "You can never have too many baskets." I agree. At one point in time, I had the three walls around my dining table filled with baskets on the walls. I put a lot of my baskets into use, at one time in my life.

Now, am a little more balanced. I do have many baskets on my wall. I left many baskets when I left a relationship, so I have fewer on the wall. I also have many baskets spread about being used for practical purposes, including cat beds, trash cans, and organizers in my pantry (I have a couple of baskets where I put pouched foods: cat and person.)

There was a time in my life when I used wicker paper plate holders for "plates." I rinsed them off and used them again. It made dish duty a lot easier. I do not know where those wicker plate holders are, or if I still have them. Hmm. I may have to go looking for them.

I like wicker. I like baskets. I even made a basket. Twice, actually. I made a rope basket that came out very good. I make a market basket of strips of thin wood that did not come out very good, but I am using it: I have it on a shelf, and keep a box of Kleenex in it. I have baskets that hold cloth napkins, baskets that hold papers I want to use to remind myself about things, baskets to hold rubber bands, and baskets to hold sample toiletries. I just like baskets.

The Wind

2011-05-21T19:53:00.000-05:00

This has been a particularly windy spring. I think I have said that before. It was windy again today. Living in town, sometimes it is difficult to estimate just how hard the wind is blowing, and if you do not pay attention to what the mph means in terms of its effect on you, the impact of the wind can be surprising.

The horizon profile and footprint of Lubbock has an interesting influence on the wind. Central Lubbock is surrounded by a Loop. Inside the Loop, the impact of the wind is largely mitigated. Depending where you are, and the direction from which the wind is blowing, the impact can be tremendous. This is especially noticeable when the dust is barely blowing outside the Loop. Inside the Loop, the dust may be barely noticeable on the horizon, but not in town.

In the winter, for houses who have pipes on the north side of the house, the pipes are more apt to freeze, than if the pipes are on the south side of the house. My house faces north, so a north wind is not felt too badly in the back yard. Because of fences, trees, and my neighbor's houses, a south or westerly wind is very noticeable in the trees, but not too bad in my yard. I do feel the east wind, though.

My front porch is enclosed on 3 sides, open to the north. It gets no sun, so is cooler than the sunny air sometimes. But unless the wind is from the north, it is stiflingly warm in the summer, especially at night, when the concrete and brick have been absorbing heat all day.

Throughout town, inside and outside the Loop, large buildings have the same mitigating effect on the wind. It is amazing.

The building I work in is in the middle of large cotton fields. We are outside the Loop. The parking lot is very large, and the walk to the building in the wind can be bitter. Especially because the parking lot is open to the north. As people on the South Plains like to say, there is nothing but barbed wire between us and the North Pole. That factor often induces me to wear a much warmer coat in the mornings than I might otherwise choose.

So, we live with the wind. It influences many choices in our lives. A friend and I went out to see if it was too windy to go kayaking today. The lake we use in town is a "run off lake." The playas and canyon lakes catch a lot of run off water. That means garden chemicals, street chemicals and trash accumulate in the lakes. We do not mind kayaking on top of the water, but do we do not want to be swamped with waves on windy days. It is less pleasant to kayak in the wind. If the water were clean, I would not mind getting wet on really warm days. But not with that water.

Connecting

2011-05-20T21:31:00.000-05:00

I have a dear friend with whom I communicate regularly. When we were in college together, we frequently had such intimate moments: we could finish each other's statements, or anticipate each other's activities, or some how be thinking and doing similar things at similar times.

Well, that has not changed. We frequently call each other within minutes of when the other was going to call. We frequently email each other within minutes of when the other was going to email, or about the same topic.

It is wonderfully reassuring to have a psychic connection to someone.

Fenway Park

2011-05-20T21:25:00.000-05:00

I have been to Fenway Park http://boston.redsox.mlb.com/bos/ballpark/index.jsp. We were fortunate, when we were children, that we were able to get to Fenway Park once or twice a year. We enjoyed the trip, which also usually included some other Boston experience: visiting the Sears store, the Boston Science Museum, or who knows. And, it almost always involved stopping at a Howard Johnson's restaurant http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Howard_Johnson's, (which do not seem to have survived so much as the motels have) at least for ice cream, if not for a meal.

Well, Fenway Park celebrates its centennial anniversary on April 20, 2012, the same day the Titanic sank. So, there will be a celebration: there have been lots of updates and improvements made to Fenway Park recently, very much anticipating the centennial.

Go Fenway!

Lots of Baseball

2011-05-20T21:13:00.001-05:00

Well, the blog follower knows that I am a Red Sox and Yankee baseball fan. Living in West Texas, we do not even get good coverage of Ranger baseball, although may change, given the big TV contract they have entered into with Fox Sports
http://www.bizofbaseball.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=4718:report-texas-rangers-ink-20-year-3-billion-television-deal&catid=57:television&Itemid=122.

The last couple of years, I seem to be getting access to a lot of Red Sox and Yankee games. Traditionally, the national coverage has aired when the Red Sox and Yankees play each other. Of course, sometimes, but not always, when one of those teams plays the Texas Rangers, I might see a game or two, especially if it is on the weekends. For some reason, the Houston Astros get better coverage.

If either team plays a Chicago team, I might get coverage on WGN. And TBS or TNT might also cover games.

This year, I seem to be able to tune into a large amount of Red Sox or Yankee baseball. I am delighted. This has been a lot of fun.

Returning Phone Calls

2011-05-18T22:26:00.000-05:00

I am usually very good at returning phone calls, whether they are personal or professional. In the professional setting I try to return phone calls within 48 business hours, but really, much sooner. I think that is important.

On a personal note, I "lived" with my cell phone for a period of 6 to 8 years, for various reasons. After my mother died, it did not seem as important to me to live with my phone. I often leave it behind, or once I turn it off, it stays off for days, or I forget to check it for voicemail messages.
I am not trying to be rude about phone calls. I am just not that connected right now.

One of my uncles did not have a telephone for a long time. And when he finally did, long before the days of answering machines, his philosophy was that the phone was for his convenience. So, he only answered it when it was convenient to him. He also said if someone wanted to speak to him seriously enough, that person would call back. I tend to agree. For a long time, I answered the phone as soon as I could. I finally learned that I could let the phone ring for a while, or not answer it as all, as I wanted.

However, once we have moved into the world of answering machines, voicemail or message takers, once a message is left, my thinking is that the recipient has an obligation to respond. My reasoning is that if you have made yourself available to hear messages, then you have an obligation to respond to those messages appropriately. And, I realize that there are some messages that are unsolicited, or do not require a response for various reasons. Having said that, I have often used answering machines or voice messaging as call screening. But, I do not ignore phone calls.

In a professional setting, I think that responding to phone calls is important. I think it gives an indication of the professionalism of the recipient. It gives an indication of how respectful people are of other people. It says "you are important."

I realize that people are very busy and can not always respond immediately to phone calls. And some professionals set aside certain times to make and return phone calls. Which means that phone calls may not be returned immediately. But professionals who do not return phone calls in a timely way send a message to me: I have to wonder if they think they are too important to be bothered with me. I have to wonder if they think they are more important than I am. I have to wonder if they are serious about wanting to interact with me. I have to wonder if they are reliable.

On a personal level, I want to return phone calls to family and friends to stay connected. For personal business, of course I need to enter into dialogue so returning phone calls is important. And certainly, on a professional level, I want to project a sincere image of being interested, engaged, and concerned and therefore, responding appropriately to phone calls.

Are You Kidding Me?

2011-05-16T23:34:00.000-05:00

I recently opened a savings account at the Texas Tech Federal Credit Union https://www.texastechfcu.org/. I have had an open account there for years: it was a checking account with interest. But when I went to work at the prison, I could not access the account easily, and I moved my primary account to a local bank that was eventually bought out by Wells Fargo. And even more recently, I set up to allow electronic transfer of funds to and from the Texas Tech Credit Union, and my primary bank, Wells Fargo.

After verifying the the account transfers were valid, I was in the process of setting up an electronic transfer from Wells Fargo to the Texas Tech Credit Union. The transfer was going to cost me $3.00. What! Are you kidding me? I can make the same transfer with a paper check (I do not pay for my checks) and a $.44 stamp.

What do you think?

Wearing My Religion On My Sleeve

2011-05-16T00:03:00.002-05:00

I was born and raised a Roman Catholic. At one point in my life, I read at Mass, attended daily mass at St. John's Church http://www.christianchurchesonline.com/scripts/hostedsites/org.asp?p=1&ID=2548 in Millers Falls , and frequently at Cornell University and the College of Our Lady of the Elms, and even graduated from a Roman Catholic college, The College of Our Lady of the Elms http://www.elms.edu/.

After graduating from Our Lady of the Elms, , I accepted a position at Catholic Family Service, Inc. for the Diocese of Amarillo, http://cfsama.com/ but was stationed in Lubbock, Texas. Eventually, the Diocese of Lubbock was created, and Catholic Family Service, Inc. in Lubbock http://www.cfslubbock.org/ was also created. I worked there ten years, before I moved on to other employment. But my admiration, respect and caring for the agency has not diminished.

A few years ago, there was a 25th anniversary of the agency, and I attended. I was asked about being a committee or board member, and I applied. I am on the PR/Membership committee, and this year, was elected to the board. I was delighted but intimidated. I am honored to serve, but do not have deep pockets, business or money contacts that board members are often asked to utilize.

I am delighted that the new director has asked me to contribute in regards to professional areas: licensing, supervision, documentation training, and planning for counseling. What an honor.

I do not wear my religion on my sleeve. I do pray, daily. But I do not make a show of it. I start my day with a thanks to God. I pray at other times during the day, but not do so that anyone would notice.

I have several colleagues who wear their religion on their sleeve: they pray noticeably, and otherwise discuss their religious practices. I am not comfortable with that. I think God knows what I am doing and why, and I do not need to proselytize, because as a professional social worker, using my influence to proselytize would be an abuse of power. I am not criticizing my colleagues who pray openly. I am just saying that my faith in God, which does not change, is private, and also offers others the opportunity to have private but hopeful interfaces with the Maker.

Going Back to Bed (This Might Be More Information Than You Want to Know)

2011-05-15T23:07:00.001-05:00

Taki, the new kitty in my life, is growing and developing in amazing ways. This kitty was urinating in its sleep shortly after starting to eat well. That has stopped. Now, urination is occurring after a meal, and I am able to put her in a litter box to encourage its use.

Taki does not poop regularly, but with stimulation, does. The kitty did poop spontaneously once, when it was in the litter box. So, this is encouraging.

Tonight, Take wandered around and around, and after a meal, found the way into the sleeping basket. This is amazing to me!

I am so hopeful this kitty will survive.

Sunday is Sheet Washing Day

2011-05-15T22:49:00.000-05:00

Sunday is sheet washing day, and today was no different. I pulled the sheets and pillow cases off the bed early afternoon, at an opportune time when not one of the cats was on the bed. All the laundry has been washed, dried, and what could be hung up or placed in drawers, was put away. The pillow cases are back on the pillows. But, since about 7:30 PM, there has been one or two cats on the bed, constantly. I try very hard not to disturb the cats to make the bed. But sometimes, it comes down to that. It is getting late. It may come down to that.

Enjoying the Day

2011-05-15T22:27:00.001-05:00

I have had some chores to do today, but for the most part, I have been able to sit back and enjoy the day. I bought a lot of stuff to cook on the grill, and sat out to watch it cook, make sure a wayward cat did not try to get on the hot grill (some came around and sniffed) and in general enjoy the outside. The weather started out grey, but became sunny, and remained cool. I put on a light jacket when I was sitting in the shade.

I had planned to cook and then package some of the meat to freeze. I did not realize I did not have much foil, and I like to wrap the meat in foil before I put it in a bag. Oh well, I decided not to get to the store today, and I can get there tomorrow on my way home from a meeting, and work on this one night during the week.

A few years ago, I was visiting my brother. He was raised Roman Catholic, but eventually converted to being a member of the Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. He made the comment to me that he really tries to keep Sunday, and not do any commercial activities. He might golf on Sunday, but mostly does home or family things. We grew up in a part of the world where most stores were closed on Sunday, although movie theaters, bowling alleys, restaurants and the like were open. So, this is not really a totally foreign idea.

At the time I mentally scoffed at the idea. But, as time goes by, I have begun to adopt that practice more and more. I still go to a concert, kayak, visit with friends, go to the library. And, I do occasionally do commercial things, but have really decreased my Sunday commercialism.

In addition to groceries, gasoline and the library, my other semi-regular weekend activity is to go to the craft store. I prefer Hobby Lobby http://www.hobbylobby.com/ to Michael's http://www.michaels.com/, Jo-Ann http://www.joann.com/joann/home/home.jsp, or Hancock http://www.hancockfabrics.com/. It used to irritate me the Hobby Lobby is not open on Sunday. Now, I do not even think about it. If I am going to the craft stores, I am going on Saturday. No matter which one.

I appreciate having access to stores on Sunday, but Hobby Lobby is an example of a chain that can survive and be closed on Sunday. So, while I like knowing I can have access to stores on Sunday, more and more, I do not access them.

Soft Serve Ice Cream

2011-05-15T11:11:00.000-05:00

I grew up in Western Massachusetts. Massachusetts has a wonderful history of ice cream: Howard Johnson's http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Howard_Johnson's was known for their 28 flavors. Friendly's http://www.friendlys.com/ was another chain that featured ice cream as well as other foods. There were many local producers of ice cream, including chain convenient stores, such as Cumberland Farms. http://www.cumberlandfarms.com/. As time passed, there were even more exquisite producers of ice cream, such as Ben and Jerry's http://www.benjerry.com/, the Edys brand http://www.dreyers.com/main/index.asp?b=105, or or the commercial kinds found in grocery stores.

We had soft serve ice cream. There were many individually owned stands that were open in the summer only. Some were just for ice cream. Some expanded to serving hot dogs, hamburgers and subway sandwiches. We had Dairy Queens, also, but mostly they were open in the summer. They were called Braziers Dairy Queens http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dairy_Queen#Dairy_Queen_Brazier. I loved soft serve ice cream.

Imagine my delight when I moved to Texas and I discovered that Dairy Queens www.dairyqueen.com/us-en/ are widespread in West Texas, and are opened all year round. My first job in Texas had me driving all over West Texas, and lo and behold, Dairy Queens were often found in these little towns, long before McDonald's http://www.mcdonalds.com/us/en/home.html or Burger King http://www.bk.com/ made it there.

I do not eat much ice cream any more. But I still love soft serve ice cream.

The Letter Carrier Food Drive

2011-05-14T22:17:00.003-05:00

Lubbock, Texas has an internationally reknown food bank, the South Plains Food Bank: http://www.spfb.org/site/c.lgLQIVOyGpF/b.5475427/k.5CCB/South_Plains_Food_Bank.htm
and as an adjunct to that food bank, a food dehydration plant http://www.breedlove.org/about_us.html. I think the dehydration plant was the vehicle that vaulted the Food Bank to fame.

However it happened, it is wonderful that the South Plains can help with providing food to people all over the world, who otherwise would be in dire straights.

The Food Bank has many "food drives." One of the biggest starts around Thanksgiving, and is geared to fill the coffers so families in need have Thanksgiving and Christmas meals worthy of the season. The citizens of Lubbock respond generously, and I hope we do help most or all families of need.

Today was the National Association of Letter Carriers Food Drive http://www.nalc.org/commun/foodrive/. I always try to contribute to this food drive. I think this is a great plan. The letter carriers distribute cards and bags so people are informed and have bags in which to put food.

I hope everyone who was informed of this food drive was able to contribute.

A Disquieting Visitor

2011-05-14T21:52:00.002-05:00

I suppose I should have written about this last night, but did not. About 9:30 PM last night, a young man came to my front door. He was on his cell phone. He asked very politely if anyone was living in my "back house." He was about 5'6" and had a long face. He was clean shaved, and his head was shaved. He was slim. I told him I do not have one, and he apologized, and left, but asked what street this was. Stupidly, I told him. (It really is easy to get confused about the streets in this neighborhood. I sometimes turn down the wrong street, trying to get home, when I am distracted.)

I had the house wide open: the front door was locked, but the windows were up. I had windows up in the front, sides and back of the house. I immediately closed all those windows except in the bedroom, which I lowered and locked.

The truth be known, I have, from time to time, left the house wide open until the wee hours of the morning. I know this is very unsafe, but I am not able to sleep, and I like the fresh air. I have decided I have to be more security minded.

So, tonight, I closed the house just before writing this.

Paranoia

2011-05-14T21:31:00.002-05:00

I have now finished Travels in Siberia by Ian Frazier http://us.macmillan.com/travelsinsiberia. One of the author's recurrent themes was paranoia. When he would get discouraged, disheartened, or just really tired, he would get paranoid. Initially, when he was travelling in Russia, his command of the language was minimal, so he was left out of a lot of what was happening around him, including what his own fate would be, unless he was with English speaking Russians (and, the truth be known, there are quite a few.) But he often expressed that he became suspicious and paranoid, not knowing what the plans were and what would happen next.

For much of his journeys, he had a guide, who came well recommended by someone he trusted, and who was in his employ, but seemed to be a little high-handed at times, and did not include him in everything that was transpiring. It was probably for the best. I suspect sometimes things were done colloquially and not by the book. And, one of the reasons he hired the guide, was to do just that. But, he had suspicions of the man's character. Additionally there were long periods of being confined with him, and his helper, in an often unreliable vehicle that the guide procured, as they travelled across Siberia. My suspicion was that the vehicle was as good as it would get, anyway. But it was not trust and faith inspiring. So, this contributed to the paranoia.

I work in a psychiatric prison, and sometimes, our patients experience paranoia based on basically the same thing. They may not be English speaking. Or, they may be so naive and unaware of the prison culture, that they simply have no concept of what is occurring around them, and how people in prison are inclined to lie, extort, take advantage, and in general dominate others any way they can.

I never thought about it, but I can understand how this would contribute to paranoia, and I would be susceptible to such paranoia in those circumstances.

The Enemy of My Enemy is My Friend... Sort of

2011-05-14T20:27:00.000-05:00

Neither Sake nor Haiku are very happy about having TLK in the house. Haiku, being so much more mellow, is more accepting. Sake is just mean and bitter. Haiku is breaking the rules, and more and more, exerting her place, and sitting where Sake is: both on the sofa back, both in the open window in my bedroom (each on their own side), both on the bed at the same time, and not separated by as much bed as possible.

So, either Haiku thinks the enemy of my enemy is my friend, or, since she is no longer "low man on the totem pole" she has more confidence that allows her to exert herself.

Deadly Medicine

2011-05-14T20:18:00.002-05:00

I have talked about going to the Texas Tech Museum to see the traveling exhibit "Deadly Medicine" http://www.ushmm.org/museum/exhibit/traveling/details/index.php?content=deadly_medicine&type=current from the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum. I went today to hear a guided tour. The tour was okay, and then I went through part of the exhibit. I did not complete it due to time constraints, and am hoping to return, maybe even tomorrow, to complete it. There is a LOT of information in this fairly small exhibit. It is in Lubbock until August 7, 2011, so there is time. And, it travels elsewhere around the country, including Boston.

The sadness of this exhibit is that we do not learn: since World War II, there have been so many incidents of genocide in Europe, Asia and Africa. The United States was slow to desegregate the Afro-Americans, and even slower to elevate the Native Americans to a respected group. We still have racism, and we still have prejudice, lessons we have not learned from our own history and the history of the world. We are trying. I can not say how much better we are doing. Many of the women in one of my book discussion clubs thinks we are treating Muslims much the same. In many ways, I agree.

I think we have some personal and political hysteria that every Muslim is bad, and we are vulnerable to attack from them. Lubbock has a mosque, and on multiple occasions, it has been vandalized. http://lubbockonline.com/stories/102606/loc_102606030.shtml The community as a whole despairs at these attacks, but obviously, they have happened. Many of the larger Christian churches in the community, after 9-11-2001, spent Sunday School time studying Islam. That is such an enlightened response to that attack, it made me proud.

I have learned some about Islam as many prisoners are Islamic. And, I am just interested in being more aware and open minded, if I can be, and education helps.

So, I am grateful to be able to view the "Deadly Medicine" display. I am grateful to learn about more about the horrors I of which I already knew, so maybe I can be more mindful if dignity, respect, civil and human rights as I deal with disenfranchised people in the course of my life. I am grateful to keep alive the message we must work to stop people from going there again.

Medicine Droppers

2011-05-14T00:11:00.001-05:00

I bought pet feeding bottles for TLK. However, the nipples were very stiff. Even with a much enlarged hole, the amount of effort required to produce contents from the bottle through the nipple were such that I did think that TLK could successfully suckle from the bottles. So, I used a large plastic medicine dropper that I had.

When TLK became constipated, and I thought mineral oil could help, I bought additional medicine droppers to use for the mineral oil: these were in a blister pack, glass, with one straight tip and one bent tip. I got to thinking about it, after a few days (I am very slow) and realized, if something happened to the plastic medicine dropper, I would be stuck. The glass droppers would do, but not as well as the large plastic dropper.

I was in a grocery store last night, (a local chain that does a lot of community service, http://www.unitedtexas.com/) and amongst my list of to look for items was a medicine dropper. I could not find one, so asked the pharmacy technician. He informed me that the store gave those away, and they gave me one. Wow!....

Doing Better, I Think

2011-05-13T23:57:00.000-05:00

I think TLK is dong better. Both eyes are now open. The kitten can climb into and out of the shallow basket that has been her home. The kitten made 3/4 of a circle from the basket and around the living room to get to me, to be fed. I was concerned because the kitten did not waken hungry, and did not waken until I woke the kitten for feeding. Today, that has changed. I did not work today, and the kitten was in the living room with me as I was reading. More than once it awoke, and cried until I picked it up. It was not consoled by being picked up, but the tenor of its cry changed. Mmmm.

From almost the beginning, urinating was not a problem. Until last night, bowel movements were few and far between, even with the help of mineral oil. But last night and today, the bowel movements, while not large, have been consistent as to be expected for a baby.

I am feeling encouraged. I do hope this kitten survives. I have no delusions that while it seems to be doing well, things can still happen.

The adult cats have settled in. Haiku comes around to sit with me on the bed, on the sofa and at the computer, not quite as always. She does not use the chair to the right of the computer, as the kitten is on the floor in the basket, to the right. But otherwise, she is cool.

Sake is not happy. She will come into the living room when the kitten is there, but only with very vocal complaint. She is wanting attention, but in other rooms. And she hisses at the baby.

Strange Spring

2011-05-13T23:43:00.000-05:00

I do not know for sure, because I have not documented the weather in the past, but this seems to be a strange spring. We have already had some 90 and 100 degree weather. The wind has blown incessantly it seems, although the dust storms have not been as vicious as some I have seen in the past. Now it is May, and we are having some cooler weather. We have had minimal rain, and are in a terrible drought.

There have been killer tornadoes in the southeast, and the Midwest flooding is some of the worst it has been.

Who knows what is going on. There may be some speculation and attempts at scientific explanations, but what happens, happens...

Changing Plans

2011-05-13T19:11:00.000-05:00

I had an plan to attend a mystery reading book last night. I even read the book. But I also had the opportunity to attend a lecture about the Roma, "The Genocide of the Roma in the Holocaust," lecture by Ian Hancock, at the Museum of Texas Tech University http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Romani_people. Do you know who the Roma are? I have heard about gypsies before, and occasionally in writings, I have heard characters described as of Romany decent. But I never really understood what that was referring to. I knew they were dark, and often described as swarthy. But beyond that, I did not understand. I also knew that Hitler and the Nazi regime wanted to eliminate them along with the Jews. I had no idea how widespread they were. I went to the lecture. It opened a new part of the world to me, something I had little, peripheral information about. Wow! That was really exciting.

The lecturer last night explained how the people were from the Indian subcontinent, and how they eventually settled in Europe. He talked about how they are very clannish, and do not encourage education. He also talked about how they do not usually identify themselves in public. He made a distinction between the Roma, and the Irish gypsies who are Irish and travel in wagons, hence the name gypsy. He said the Roma were called Gypsies, because people thought they originally came from Egypt.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roma_people;http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Romani_people. These articles explain about the Roma. They are consistent with what the speaker said last night. He is a college professor, and he is a Roma.

Struggling

2011-05-13T18:39:00.001-05:00

I am reading a book for the Reading Circle of the Texas Tech Osher Lifelong Learning Institute http://www.depts.ttu.edu/outreach/. The books we read expand my horizon, as I generally only read mysteries, unless another book comes highly recommended to me.

This month, the group will be discussing Travels in Siberia by Ian Frazier. I have struggled to read this book. There are several reasons. First, as most of us probably admit to, the variations of Russian names for one person is confusing. Not unfathomable, but confusing.

Second, the author has a mishmash style: Sometimes he uses "here we have;" sometimes he uses capitals and blocks of data. His grammatical style is often obtuse, very much what I would think might occur if someone was translating from Russian, and not doing it very well.

Third: There are multiple chronologies in the book. Some make sense, but many do not.

I am in hopes of completing this book before the discussion group next week, but if that does not happen, it does not happen.

So it Rained. Finally.

2011-05-13T18:38:00.000-05:00

Well, we had a chance of precipitation, and early this morning, a storm line blew threw. There was wind, thunder, lightning, some hail up to golf ball size, and rain. It started about 5:10 or so AM. I was wakened by the thunder and the weather radio. I stayed awake, but moved to the sofa and just relaxed. Storms do that to me. I had The Weather Channel on, for updates.

My rain gauge, which seems to "under report" indicated a little less than a half inch of rain. The hail was so sparse, no damage occurred. By this afternoon, the wind, which blew all day, had dried the fields and dust was blowing, once again.

Yesterday, I did not open the windows because of the heat. Today, I have opened the house, in hopes of cooling it down, but it takes a while.

Thank God for the rain!

A Rocking Chair

2011-05-10T22:37:00.000-05:00

My mother had a Boston Rocker. I loved that rocking chair. We had some lawn chairs with rockers, and they were fine, but not the same.

A friend of mine had an old rocker that was wonderful to sit in. I really enjoyed it. He also had a swivel rocking recliner that came nowhere near the rocking chair.

Later in life, my brother bought some rocking chairs for my parents, to use on their porch. They were exquisite.

I am not sure where those rockers are now.

I do not have a rocking chair. I have told myself several times that I want a rocking lawn chair, but that has not happened. But, I have never considered a real rocking chair as a piece of living room furniture.

I do not have the room in my livng room for a rocking chair. But with feeding a baby kitten, I am more and more convinced I need a rocking chair. Hmm, we shall see what we shall see.

A rocking chair can be exquisite.

Desert Snow

2011-05-10T22:21:00.000-05:00

Writing about the desert brings to mind a trip I made from Lubbock, TX to Phoenix, AZ in December 2004. There was a slight winter storm, so snow covered the desert.

I remember year after year of magical snows in New England: the snow, especially powdery snow, made the world look like a crystal kingdom. It coated everything and sparkled in the sunlight. At night, in the moon light it still sparkled.

This trip into the desert was also magical. The snow was a fine accent on the geological and plant features along the way. It sparkled and highlighted the outlines with a sharp contrast to the features. It was awesomely beautiful.

Years ago, when I still lived in New England, I read a story about a family who were spending Christmas in the desert. They missed the snow and cold, but found a tumbleweed tree, and decorated it, and shared their Christmas spirit with other folks in the campgrounds. When I drove through this winter storm in the desert, it reminded me of that story and its message about relationships and human connections. It swelled my heart, and as I re-tell this tonight, it swells my heart again.

The desert is not devoid of life and human connection. We just have to open our minds, our eyese and our hearts to know what is there.

This is the Desert - Well, Sort Of

2011-05-10T22:08:00.001-05:00

I am not going to write about the drought which we are experiencing, and which is making us all heart sick. It is too sad to think about.

I am going to write about the night air. It was in the 90s today. It was hot. But there was a brisk breeze, which ameliorated the intensity of the heat, some. Not much, but some.

Until the sun began to sink, and the direct rays were no longer beating on us. In the shade, and in the cooling influence of the breeze, the evening air was really, really pleasant. This is an aspect of the South Plains that is often over looked. Until sometimes as late as July, the evening air in Lubbock is very pleasant. The cooling effect of the breeze is amazing, and it makes for sitting out in the night air so pleasant. And, this year because of the drought, we do not have the mosquitoes bothering us like we do some years. So nice.

We are not technically a desert region: we are considered "semi-arid." I think the distinction is the difference in average rain fall. But like the true desert, we experience the temperature extremes between night and day. Such as today and tonight.

Lazlo Toth and Corporate America

2011-05-09T22:49:00.000-05:00

In the 1960s, 1970s and 1980s I frequently wrote letters to corporate American, generally with complaints, but sometimes with praise regarding the way they conducted business. I was a fan of Saturday Night Live, and the character by Don Novello, Father Guido Sarducci. At some point in time, he started writing letters to corporate and government individuals, using the name of Lazlo Toth, with some success of response http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_Novello. I told a supervisor about my penchant for writing to corporations about various things, and she turned me on to Lazlo Toth. He has a few books. I already own a couple, and am ordering another.

I do not write to corporate American with the frequency I used to write, but sometimes, I still do let corporate America know what I am thinking. Maybe I need to do more of that. (Maybe we all do.)

Most recently, I wrote to the people who market the Acura http://www.acura.com/ModelLanding.aspx?model=TL. Their marketing campaign calls the car "aggressive." I think we have too much aggression in society, and touting a car as aggressive will only add to our ills. An aggressive car begs for the driver to engage in road rage with no abandon, and no regard for consequences.

I have sent a snail mail letter to the car company about my concerns. But really, folks, are they not smart enough and wise enough to realize that advertising a car as aggressive is inviting road rage. Are they not smart enough to realize that someone being sued for road rage will blame their advertisement as the precipitating or influencing factor?

Change of Habits

2011-05-08T15:43:00.000-05:00

I am a creature of habit. One is that I tend to plan a kayak ride for later in the day. I think this is because during the week, I go kayaking after work. There has not been too much kayaking this year: the wind has been too strong, and the dust makes being outside uncomfortable. But, I have had the chance to go.

I was thinking about kayaking later today. But, I heard the weather report, and it send windy later today, with possible gusts up to 40 mph. I decided to get out there and get it done. I am glad I leave the kayak loaded for the most part during the summer. It makes getting out to the lake quicker, one less thing to do to get there.

I had a great ride around the lake. Yesterday, I saw a sailboater loading up to go. I would have enjoyed watching him on the water. Later in the day, I saw a fisherman launch a 2 person sit-on-top kayak. Today, there was a john boat out, and the occupant was obviously fishing. It is nice to get out.

I also enjoyed the birdwatching both days. Some different birds, some the same. And of course, the turtles were sunning.

I am glad I am flexible enough to change my habits.

Proud to be there

2011-05-08T15:24:00.000-05:00

This past week was officer appreciation week. The Montford prison does it up right: they prepare a meal for the staff. And there is a ceremony dedicated to the officers who lost their lives in the line of service for the past year. There were none in Texas this year. That was good. The ceremony was, as always, impressive. In addition to the riderless horse, a bagpiper and drummer played Amazing Grace. A bagpipe always sends chills and brings tears. The article gives a good, if incomplete, description of the ceremony and the symbols involved. Everyone did a good job. Honoring our staff gives me pause to think, and proud to be a part of this unit, even though I am not a correctional officer.

I included in the labels "celebration." While this was a memorial and a ceremony, it was also a celebration of life and the good that correctional officers do.

http://lubbockonline.com/crime-and-courts/2011-05-06/officers-montford-prison-unit-honor-fallen-comrades-across-us

Cat-O-Rama

2011-05-08T15:03:00.000-05:00

It is a luxury not to have to do a lot today. Many of my Sundays are very restful, for which I am grateful. Today started, as it does every day, with feeding the adult cats. Added to that, I fed the baby, which went well.

Sake was inconsolable about not being able to go out, so soon after I finished feeding the baby, we went out front. After a while Haiku joined us. This was fine with me. It was a beautiful morning, and I read the newspaper and did the puzzles while they were out.

By the time I came in, it was almost time to feed The Little Kitty again.

So, much of my morning was taken up with cat care. How blessed I am to be able to have this luxury.

The Little Kitty

2011-05-07T20:46:00.000-05:00

I really do not want another cat. I have two, and the balance of acceptance between them is precarious at best. Even as adults, after 8 and a half years, they do not always get along. It is rare they can both be on the bed at the same time. It is rare they can both be on the sofa at the same time. The only place they can both be at the same time regularly is the garage. I am not in there, so I do not know what kind of aggression or abuse occurs in the garage, if any.

Yesterday afternoon, I found a very listless kitten in my backyard. I knew of this kitten's existence for about a week, and the mother seemed to be feeding it, although the mother did not spend a lot of time with this kitten (and it's litter mate, whom I found dead, later on yesterday.)

I really thought the kitten was dead at first, and brought it into the house to wrap it to put it in the dumpster. Dummy me. The kitten was alive. I quickly made some powdered milk with melted butter in it, and dropped some food into the kitten after I finally found the medicine dropper. I put it in a cushioned basket, and went to a nearby pet store, where I got some kitty formula and nursing bottles.

I tried several times to get the kitten to drink, and it was very resistant. I could only get it to take drops. Although the guides say to feed a kitten every 2-4 hours (depending on the guide), I decided to let it sleep through the night, and see what I could do in the morning.

So, in the morning, I got drops down the kitten. I was talking to a friend about this, and recounted, how, once when I was tending an orphaned calf, he did not want to eat. We added Karo syrup (sugar syrup) to the formula, because I knew that farmers put molasses on hay for cows in the northeast, to stimulate their appetite. So, I made up some sugar water, and used it for mixing the powdered kitten milk. I do not know if it was the sugar water, or strength from the little milk the kitten was consuming, or prayers answered by God, but the little kitten had a good dinner later afternoon.

Early evening, I fed the kitten again, and again it had a good meal, as compared to the drops it was taking earlier today, and last night. I have to think it is the sugar water, and our faith that what should be will be.

How Late is Too Late?

2011-05-04T21:53:00.000-05:00

The Angels and Red Sox baseball game was scheduled to be on ESPN television tonight. I had a meeting I wanted to attend, but turned the game on when I returned home. Except, I saw "bonus coverage" including part of the Yankee vs. Tigers game. A couple of times during the telecast, the announcers talked about the Red Sox vs. Angels rain delay, and the game was in the top of the 5th inning.

The game was scheduled to start a little after 7 PM Eastern Daylight Time. It is now almost 11 PM Eastern Daylight Time, and they are getting ready to resume the game. There are a few fans left in the ball park.

I understand why they want to restart the game. It will not take much more to make the game a complete game, even if there is another rain delay afterwards. Completing the game means that it will not have to be rescheduled, which chore sometimes is very difficult. My question is, how late is too late to restart a baseball game?

Doing Better

2011-05-03T22:30:00.000-05:00

Years ago, I was at a training of some sort, and the comment was made that life is a series of relapses. It is an interesting concept, and one that I think holds true. And, it does not necessarily apply to drug use or alcohol use, or even illness, although that is the context in which we usually think of relapse.

We go through periods of taking really good care of ourselves physically, then we slack off. We might diet very carefully, then not pay attention to what we eat, or we gain back weight we lost, or eat the wrong foods, or too little food. We may have episodes of insomnia in our lives, then we sleep well. We may exercise regularly, then for some reason, do not have the time, mental or physical energy, or have ill health that interferes with exercising.

The list is endless: we may be diligent about housework, then decide something else is more important. We may have a garden one year, and decide not to worry about the yard and garden the next. We may become involved in a craft, but then lose interest. We may study for a degree or pleasure, then decide not to tax our brain. We may follow sports very closely, then decide to put our time elsewhere. Or, we become discouraged by the performance of a once winning team that is now in a losing cycle. We may be very active in our community, and then we may decide we have had enough.

I am not sure if life is a series of relapses, but it seems to me, we do cycle a great deal. And, knowing this, we can expect that there are times in our lives when we are in a down cycle. And, in an up cycle.

And, being in a down cycle does not mean we are at rock bottom, just we are not doing as well as we would like. Just like being in an up cycle does not mean we have "arrived," just that we are doing better. So, in a down cycle, we know we can work to turn the corner, and go up. As with when we are doing better, maybe it is the best we can hope for, but that is not so bad. And, we can try not to start a down spin.

Maybe thinking in terms of life going in cycles can give us a perspective on where we are today, and where we would like to be; what part of the cycle we are in, and what we can do to correct or maintain it.

In The Spot Light

2011-05-03T22:02:00.000-05:00

In this day and age of instantaneous news, it is amazing how many spectacular events are "in the spotlight." Last week's tornado outbreak with the hundreds of deaths and untold numbers of injuries, and property damage of untold value. I learned about this news story from The Weather Channel.

The "wedding of the century" between Prince William and Kate Middleton was another international media event. While I have seen or heard snippets of coverage on TV, the newspaper, the radio, and the Internet, I did not follow the story closely, nor watch the event. I know this is a public couple and the publicity is to be expected, and maybe, hoped for, but I do not wish to follow their private lives.

The killing of Osama bin Laden is another international news story that I missed until the next day, because I was not watching TV nor listening to the radio. I was on the computer, but not on the Internet, so I missed out until I was going to work the next morning.

Many of the "big news" stories are peripheral to my life. Am I a "bad citizen" because of that? I hope not. I get a hard copy of the Lubbock Avalanche Journal. I read the headlines of the Greenfield Recorder, the New York Times, and the Austin Statesman on line. So, I see the headlines, and a get information from a variety of perspectives.

I just do not study the news nor immerse myself in it. I want to be informed, but I find the news distressing and depressing. And, sometimes, I feel like a voyeur into the lives of people who are in the news. I think some of them do not mind, because they put their stories out there. But, I mind. I do not want to know their personal, private business. I deal with the personal, private lives of patients everyday. I guess that meets my quota.

I am on Facebook, and I will tell you, I really am a voyeur there. I rarely post on my own page, and only seldom comment in someone else's. I am thankful that my younger relatives share their lives so freely, as it has been a way for me to get to know them and keep up with their lives.

I am just not that interested in sharing things with so many people. If you want to know, send me an email, and ask. If I am repeating myself, I know how to cut and paste, so it is not boring or tedious to me to answer you. But my life does not need to be in the spotlight.

Human Beings vs. Human Doings

2011-05-01T22:38:00.000-05:00

I wrote about doing the other day. Sometimes, I find myself doing a lot. Today was a day when I had several activities to which I wanted to attend. But they were all manageable, and in between, I had some down time.

I am sure you have heard this before: We are human beings, not human doings. That can be applied in more than one way. We do not always need to be doing anything. We should allow down time so we can appreciate the world around, including other people, the flora and fauna of the world, the beauty and scenery around us, whether created by the supreme being, his universe, or by humankind.

Many of us place no value in our basic existence. We identify ourselves by various means: how we are related to someone, where we live, what we do for employment, what we accomplish. Those traits are all important factors in expressing who we are, and help to distinguish one person from another. But those factors imply or relate directly to doing. They do no relate the message that I am who I am, and have value as a human being, just because I am alive.

For those of us who can accept this message, it makes the rest of our life have a different meaning. If I can no longer do what I do, be in a relationship that I want, have the material things I want, I am no less a person, and have no less value.

If we remember to think this way, it reminds us what we have been taught as Christians, by our Lord, that whatever we do to the least of our brothers, we do to the Lord. It reminds us that no matter how dire the circumstances in which we find ourselves, we have value as a human being because we are alive. And, because of that value, we have a responsibility to live our life to the best of our ability to do so, no matter the circumstances in which we find ourselves.

Although the United States Delcaration of Independence says "all men are created equal" it does not say we are all created the same. Equal implies with the equal opportunity to strive for the unalienable rights with which the Declaration says we are endowed. The Declaration does not say we all have equal talents and abilities to undertake that effort, nor will we achieve equal results. We just have equal rights to be alive and live a human beings.

We ignore the lesser amongst us too often. Their being means that they deserve our respect and dignified attention as do those with great wealth, power, prestige and fame or notoriety. We just forget that too often. This is not a lesson to remember just at Christmas time, when we traditionally reach out to the lesser amongst us. And, it is a lesson we should call to mind at Easter, when we celebrate the miracle of Christ's resurrection.

But, it is primarily a lesson we should call to mind every day, when we see someone in lesser circumstances as ourselves. Not to appreciate how much better off we are than someone else, but to look within, and see what we can do to offer that person some recognition of that person's worth as a human being. It may be a kind word, a blessing, a smile, an acknowledgement of their personhood, or it may be some sort of material help or assistance. It does not have to be much, just something to say "you are, so you have value."

Doing

2011-04-28T22:58:00.001-05:00

Tonight, I had too much to do. I had a social event planned with friends. A wake interposed. I had planned to do some chores last night, but with my car in the shop, the chores did not get done, but were time sensitive, and needed to be finished before morning 4/29/11.

So. I went to the social event. Made my way over to the wake. And, found an alternate way to tend to the chores than I would have normally done. It takes some creativity, effort, and time, but things can be managed.

Deadly Medicine and Corollary Activity

2011-04-28T22:40:00.000-05:00

The Texas Tech University Museum has a presentation on the medical procedures of the German Third Reich, aptly named Deadly Medicine: Creating the Master Race, in the Diamond M Gallery http://www.depts.ttu.edu/museumttu/exhsch11.html. I have not seen the exhibit yet, but plan to do so, soon.

Tonight, some friends joined me at a panel presentation about the Holocaust:

Panel Presentation by Speakers from the US Holocaust Memorial Museum, .

Marc Masurovsky - “Landscapes of Experience: The January 1945 Evacuations of the Auschwitz Camp Complex”

Martin Dean - “Spearate Jewish Residential Districts - Documenting the Universe of Nazi Ghettos”

Fabulous! Very interesting, and very sad, about the atrocities during World War II, and the perpetrators, survivors, victims, and witnesses. Hmmm.

And, another learning piece from history, but have we learned?

One of the speakers talked about how the survivors said the slightest, smallest act of help provided hope.

I see this sometimes at the prison. Just paying attention to someone gives them hope. Especially the patients with life sentences, or with no family contact.

Emily Dickinson said it so well:

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.

I've heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.

Carless

2011-04-27T21:04:00.000-05:00

Quite unexpectedly this morning, the Vue did not want to start. Finally, it did. I drove it to work, shut it off, and tried to start it. It was difficult to start, again. So, I called into work, drove home, put the car, still running, in the garage, door down. I went into the house and found my warranty information, turned in my purse, took my driver's license and credit card with me (I have these in a separate wrist holder in my purse; when I kayak, I only take this wrist holder), and drove to the dealership. The car is still under warranty, and I have an extended warranty, so even it is a simple battery replacement, I want the dealership to work on the car, in case it involves warranty work.

The courtesy van took me to work. I can take the wrist holder into the prison, so, when I get back to the car, I have what I need.

The dealership is always busy. Sometimes, when I make an appointment for service, it can be 3 to 5 working days from my phone call before I can get in. I am glad for Scoggin Dickey http://www.scoggindickey.com/ that their service business is that brisk. Their hours are extended, from 7 AM to 6:30 PM. They have a courtesy van, which takes me to and from work, as needed. So, they are relatively easy to access.

Well, because I did not have an appointment, they could not guarantee that they would even check out my vehicle today. Not good. But a car that does not start reliably is of no value to me.

So, by 4:45pm. my car was not repaired. A coworker had offered to take me home, and I took her up on her offer. Another co-worker had said she could get me to work Thursday morning. I took her up on her offer.

I could have gotten a rental car: Enterprise makes it fairly easy. http://www.enterprise.com/car_rental/deeplinkmap.do?bid=1284&xparm=lubbock-car-rental They will pick you up, and I could have done that from the house. But, I did not need to go anywhere tonight. And my ride to work was tended to.

There was a chance that, with the service department being open until 6:30 PM, my car would have been ready tonight. But it was not.

Usually, when my car is in the shop, I feel very disenfranchised: I do not have the access and control of having my vehicle available that is important to me.

Today, while I worried about timing, I was busy enough that I did not have the sense of urgency and panic I sometimes have. I had several co-workers who offered me rides to and from work. I had no sense of panic. When I arrived home, I felt oddly content that it was okay to be without a car.

That is a very different experience for me. Hmmmmmmmmm.

How the States Got Their Shapes

2011-04-27T20:31:00.000-05:00

I am watching the History Channel's How the State's Got Their Shape? http://www.history.com/shows/how-the-states-got-their-shapes. I have seen this show before, and it is a fun way to hear about history stories.

Watching the part about Vermont awakened some nostalgia in me: Seeing the very New England villages and houses. Knowing how fun and nice it was to be able to cross over to Canada with little deterrence. We did not do that often, but it was nice when we could.

We used Canadian money interchangeably with US money, although the exchange was not exactly equal. The only thing, the Canadian coinage did not work in vending machines.

So, those are some nice moments evoked by this show.

I Knew I Made a Mistake When I Made It

2011-04-26T22:59:00.000-05:00

Last night, I cooked some shrimp, which I had to peel and remove the tails. I put the tailings in the trash, but did not take the trash out to the dumpster. Well, that was a mistake. When I came home from work today, the odor was awful... I knew better, but I was being lazy: it was not too dark to go out to the alley and deposit the trash, after I had shelled the shrimp last night. I was just being lazy.

Lesson learned.

What is in the Sky?

2011-04-26T22:45:00.001-05:00

The sky and air in Lubbock has been unusual lately. We have dust storms that fill the air with very thickly suspended particles of dust. I remember a time when we had smoke clouds from Mexican wildfires, and recently, we have had smoke in the air from Texas wildfires.

Tonight, we had strange grey clouds that appeared to be real clouds. But, the low lying haze made me wonder if it was smoke or dust.

No rain happened. We need rain. What was in the sky today?

Is it Only Tuesday?

2011-04-26T22:34:00.000-05:00

It was a long day at work today: I was doing chart reviews. I usually do chart reviews on Wednesday or Thursday, so my brain is having some trouble reconciling the fact that it is only Tuesday.

But, I have had to step up my schedule: Friday all day, I am at a continuing education workshop, which counts for work, but precludes my getting things done at the unit.

So, what needed to happen, happened. It just felt weird.

150 Years Ago

2011-04-25T22:06:00.000-05:00

One hundred and fifty years ago the War Between the States started at Fort Sumter, South Carolina. It was one of the bloodiest wars ever fought. It was fought to protect a way of life: but the way of life was Northern and industrial, or Southern and agricultural, and based on slave labor to bolster the economy.

When I met Lisenby, I was a Catholic and a Northerner. Granny Merriman still talked about the War of Northern Aggression as if it had happened last year.

I had no idea how emotional people in the South were about the war. The pain and anguish lived on. I had not seen anything like it in the North.

This is a sad part of our history. But it did not end there. And it did not start there. Slavery was part of this country at its founding, and was a blight on our country then. Racism was a blight on our country for another 100 plus years and is still a blight, subtly, on this country.

But, we did the right thing. The cost, the time, the pain to accomplish what is right is untold. I am sorry my country was founded on such inhumanity, and not just to the Negro Slave, but to the First Americans, and repeatedly, at times to others who are different: Japanese, Germans, Muslims.

150 years ago, this country engaged in a war to affirm the rights of all humanity. It was the right thing to do. It is unconscionable that so many died. War is hell.

Technology

2011-04-25T21:34:00.000-05:00

There is a lot of technology involved in using a laptop computer. Thanks to my brother, who gave me a cordless mouse, I have that luxury and convenience. I like it so much, I bought a second to use on the desktop computer that I now no longer use, as it is sooooo slooooow.

The last time the batteries died in the mouse, I did not realize what was happening. All of a sudden, I could not use the mouse. And the computer seemed to freeze. But, I changed out that mouse with the one for the desktop, and was back in business. It took me some to figure out how to open the mouse, but I even did that, changed the batteries, and I was back in business.

Obviously, I did not see the warning signs that the batteries were low: the light on the mouse turned red instead of green. And, there was an icon on the laptop that told me the batteries were critical. So, this time, I was able to change out the batteries in a timely way! YEAH!

Blowing Dust

2011-04-25T20:39:00.000-05:00

We are in a drought. Today, the winds kicked up and the dust was blowing. It was low dust, you could see the blue sky above it. But it was enough to fill my sinuses and give me a headache, make me sneeze, and make my skin itch.

If you have not been in a desert dust storm, you might not understand the irritation the blowing dust and strong wind can precipitate. It has been said that the blowing wind creates negative ions in the atmosphere which can irritate people. I believe it.

I am grateful to have a house to be in, and thankful I can be out of the wind tonight.

Knitting

2011-04-25T00:11:00.000-05:00

I enjoy knitting. I give knitted baby blankets to new baby members of my family. I have knitted hand warmers for my colleagues. Recently, I was commissioned to knit mittens and a hat for an anniversary present for the wife of a coworker. I like to knit. I like to create. The repetitive act of knitting is soothing. Sometimes, the repetitive work hurts my hands. But, it is a skill I enjoy.

Sink the Bismark

2011-04-25T00:03:00.000-05:00

The other day, I heard the Johnny Horton song Sink the Bismark http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KecIdlEAKhU and realized that I had not seen the movie in some time. I like World War II movies, and thought that it might be a good movie to see in the near future.

Today, I was browsing Netflix, and the movie Sink the Bismark http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0054310/ was available for instant play. Well, how could I ignore that coincidence. I could not. So, today, I watched the movie.

Brain Chatter and Calm

2011-04-23T21:39:00.000-05:00

There is no TV, no music, no extraneous noise in the house right now. I can hear the whirr of the ceiling fan, and the windows are open, so an occasional street noise floats in. Sometimes, the quiet is so blessed, so heaven sent. I was sitting outside, but it was cool, and I decided to move in. It would be pleasant outside, if I had to be there. I am just a cold woosey.

I am grateful for so many things: I have good family and friends. I have a job I enjoy. I have a house in which to live, and transportation. I can pick my food choices, for the most part, without worry. I can pay my taxes.

I have plenty of activities which I enjoy: knitting, reading, being involved in NASW http://www.naswtx.org/displaycommon.cfm?an=1&subarticlenbr=25, and being on the board of Catholic Family Service, Inc http://www.cfslubbock.org/ . I am a dues paying member of the Heritage Fiber Guild http://www.heritagefiberguild.org/ and the Llano Estacado Audubon Society http://www.leas.bizland.com/, although my involvement in both are minimal. I take classes through the Osher Life Long Learning Institute at Texas Tech University http://www.depts.ttu.edu/outreach/ I try to attend the monthly meeting of the Barnes and Noble Mystery Book Club http://store-locator.barnesandnoble.com/store/2364?subtype=detailList&month=&day=ANY&sat=10.

I enjoy following the sporting events at Texas Tech University http://www.texastech.com/, specifically the Lady Raiders Basketball team, and I follow the football team. I had tried to follow softball, but that did not work for me. Maybe, with the new coach, I should try again.

I am still and always will be a Red Sox fan http://boston.redsox.mlb.com/index.jsp?c_id=bos&tcid=mm_nyy_sitelist and a Yankee fan http://newyork.yankees.mlb.com/index.jsp?c_id=nyy&tcid=mm_mlb_sitelist. I rarely watch the NBA games, simply because I am only a Celtics fan http://www.nba.com/celtics/ f and their games are rarely shown in this TV market. I have been a long time NASCAR fan http://www.nascar.com/. This is an endearing and enduring gift from Lisenby, for which I am so thankful.

I am sure there is more that life could offer. Yet, I am so blessed with everything I have. Thank you to my family, friends, co-workers and acquaintances for your contribution to my life.

The Way We Treat Americans

2011-04-22T22:34:00.000-05:00

I went to a book discussion group 4/21/11, and we talked about the book: "The Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet. http://www.jamieford.com/novels/. It is a very good story about the Chinese Americans and Japanese Americans in America during World War II, when, if you remember, the Japanese were interred due to their heritage.

We talked about this a lot: Most of us were not exposed to this part of American history as we were growing up. We seemed to be aware that there was a period in history when children of immigrants were encouraged to learn the new language (American English) but we did not know about the overzealous atrocities of the government to confine the people of Japanese heritage, during the war.

Our government has treated other peoples, as a whole, unwholesomely. Certainly, the Native Americans fit into this category. So too, the African-Americans. Jewish Americans. The Germans, especially during World War I.

Most of the book group echoed the same sentiment: we are now doing the same to the Muslims. This is sad. We do not need to treat people of different heritage as the enemy, just because they are different.

We need to learn from our past, that our differences do not make us enemies, and although we have differences, our similarities are more prevalent.

Drought and Wildfires

2011-04-21T22:39:00.001-05:00

We are in a drought. Not only are we in a drought in West Texas, we are in the midst of horrible wildfires, fueled, in part, by the luscious growth that occurred after last year's rains.

But the wildfires are not the only concern. The water supplies for Texas are depleting. We are being asked to conserve our yard watering. Lake Meredith http://www.nps.gov/lamr/index.htm a long time source of water for Lubbock and the South Plains, is drying out. The Ogallala Aquifer is being depleted http://www.npwd.org/new_page_2.htm.

Lake Alan Henry http://www.lakealanhenry.com/ is touted as a source of water for Lubbock, but it is down hill of the Caprock, and its contents will need to be pumped uphill.

-We live in a semi-arid region, but we live as if we are in a rain forest. Maybe we need to adjust our lifestyle.

Home Safety

2011-04-15T22:23:00.000-05:00

Two times in my life, my home has been broken into. The first time, my then husband surprised the intruder. His response was dramatic: he wanted to keep a loaded gun in our living room. I would not accept that. We did get storm windows, as these are an extra barrier to invasion.

I refused to be cowed by the experience. A colleague told me I was very strong. I just would not let the criminal "win."

In 2003, once again, my home was broken into. My computer, cell phone, and some jewelry from my first husband had been stolen. Little else was lost. The door that was breached was replaced. The computer equipment was replaced. And life went on.

Two nights this week, I noticed that the gate in my back fence was compromised. I have had padlocks on the gates, front and back, but did not lock them. The last two night, my back gate was left open, with the padlock not securing the gate, although I was sure that while not locked, the padlock was securing the gate when I check it last.

Well, once is a fluke, maybe a mistake I made. But not twice. So, I locked the locks on both the front and back gate of my fence. This is a little inconvenient, when I am taking out trash or doing yard work.

But, what is more important: convenience of yard work, or safety of home.?

The Difference in Language

2011-04-15T22:05:00.000-05:00

I am watching a British show on TV. They speak in English. Their accents and idioms are such that it is not exactly the English we speak in America. But for the most part, it is understandable. But, sometimes, I have to listen very, very closely.

The really interesting thing about that, is I find the same thing happens to me in this country. I do a little bit of traveling, and there are parts of the country where the idioms and accents are so different from what I am used to. But it is still English.

This happens to other languages: French in Canada compared to the French in France.

Spanish: "Castilian Spanish" may refer to Spanish spoken in Spain, compared to Spanish spoken in the "New World." But Spanish in Mexico is different than Spanish in Texas, California or New Mexico. Spanish in Cuba and Puerto Rico is also slightly different.

My father spoke Polish, but he understood some Russian.

Romance languages have a base in Latin, and are similar but very distinct, also.

I work in a prison. The "jargon" is very different than jargon in other fields. Each field has its own jargon. It helps to understand the different languages people speak:

When I take my car into a mechanic, I do not speak "mechanic" so I can not always effectively communicate with my mechanic so he knows what my concern is. It helps to understand the technical speak of each field.

We gravitate to people with whom we are comfortable: people who have shared similar experiences, have similar ethnic backgrounds, have similar interest. Similarities make us comfortable. Similarity in speech is most important. Even if I do not have the other backgrounds, if I can speak the same language, I have broken many barriers.

So, often, even though there are differences in language, when we focus on the similarities, we bring ourselves together.

As a high school student, I learned about Esperanto http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esperanto. I am not sure what Esperanto sounds like, but the idea of a universal language makes sense to me.

We realize that this is a small world, and the oceans and atmosphere especially join us as one. Language has made man unique among the life forms of this earth. But, we are discovering that other species have simple and complex language. Man needs to learn that it is "A Small World, After All." Man needs to learn how interdependent we really are. Language helps us, to interchange. But language keeps us apart. So maybe a universal language would help to erase our differences.

What Good is A Newspaper

2011-04-15T20:17:00.000-05:00

I subscribe to the local newspaper. I usually skim the headlines, read what stories interest me, look for local interesting events, and check sports. This morning, I checked for TV coverage of the Yankee-Rangers game. None listed.

After a windy dusty day, this evening was very pretty, so I sat out a couple of hours. Well, I came in and was flipping around looking for something to watch on TV. I found the Yankee - Ranger game in the 6th inning.

What good is the newspaper if the news is not accurate or correct?

Can You Be Addicted To Music?

2011-04-12T21:56:00.000-05:00

Recently, I wrote about a baby shower, and the CD gift the expecting parents gave to the attendants: "A Lullaby Story." This is a CD they put together, of a series of lullaby songs, songs about children, parents, relationships, going to sleep and the new morning.

I find that the songs of this CD ramble in my head throughout the day, over and over again. I hear it when I am driving, when I am reading, watching TV, trying to sleep. It is a most relaxing series of songs.

I think I am addicted to these songs. I listen to other music. But I hear this music in my head when there is nothing else there.

You Can't Judge a Book By it Cover

2011-04-11T22:04:00.000-05:00

This spring, I signed up for a class at the Lubbock Lake Landmark http://www.depts.ttu.edu/museumttu/lll/. The second session was about preserving your keepsakes. I almost did not attend. I am not a scrapbook person, and I do not keep a lot of stuff from when I travel.

And, I am now a board member for a local non-profit charitable organization. The monthly board meeting conflicted with the class I paid for. I was torn. I was assured it would be acceptable to miss a board meeting.

I went to the class. It was very interesting. The discussion included the elements that destroy or deteriorate keepsakes and mementos, and how to preserve these things. It included what kinds of things are available to preserve keepsakes.

I am not a keepsake preserver. But the information in this class was really interesting.

The Yankees and Red Sox

2011-04-10T21:48:00.000-05:00

The television hype includes advertising the long time and intense rivalry between the the New York Yankees and the Boston Red Sox. So, when they meet, I am blessed that there is national television coverage of their games.

I am a rare breed: I am a New York Yankee fan and a Boston Red Sox fan. When I get to watch their games on TV, I cheer for the Yankees or the Red Sox. But, what to do when they play together? I use the tactic I used when the University of Massachusetts came to Lubbock to play the Texas Tech Red Raiders football team: I just cheer.

And, I hope for long games, with lots of scoring, and extra innings. It is known that when the Yankees and Red Sox play, the length of their games is longer than average. For that, I am grateful. I just like their games.

Time Zone and Sunset

2011-04-09T22:53:00.001-05:00

I live in the Central Time Zone, some 60 miles (about an hour drive) from the Mountain Time Zone. One of the things that really amazed me when I moved to Texas in 1977 was the length of the days.

As has happened before, I was watching a sporting event in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. Fort Worth is about 300 miles to the east of Lubbock; Dallas, another 30 miles east. As I was watching the television broadcast, I was struck by the fact that it was dark in the Fort Worth area about 8 PM, but we still had daylight, not even dusk, in Lubbock.

This is phenomenal to me....

The Right Tools

2011-04-09T22:32:00.000-05:00

What makes an expert is someone who knows what needs to be done, how to do it, when to do it, and someone who has the right tools.

I recently worked on a knitting project, and needed a specific size circular needle. A circular needle has two working ends, and a smaller flexible cord that allows the stitches to slide back and forth to the working ends. I could not find the size I needed made by a brand with which I was familiar. So, I purchased a needle of an unknown brand. The price was reasonable, and I was able to use the needle to complete the project I was working on.

But....one of the beauties of the circular needles is that the stitches slide smoothly to the working ends without any extra motion or effort by the knitter. The needles by the unfamiliar brand had a "lip" where the connecting cord met the working ends. So, to get the stitches onto the working end, I had to physically push the stitches, instead of just sliding them. This was inconvenient, slowed down my knitting rhythm, but was not unworkable. But, if I can find a better circular needle of that size, I will obtain it for the next time I need it for a project.

So, am I saying I am a knitting expert? No. I am just commenting on the importance of the right tools.

Blowing Again

2011-04-09T18:54:00.000-05:00

It is blowing, again. This is West Texas, and Spring, and the two combine for some very blustery weather. When I was out just a little while ago, I could hear the wind roar in the lines. Which means the speed is about 35 MPH. The Weather Channel said 28 MPH gusting to 36 MPH. I really do get tired of the wind.

Interestingly, I am watching the NASCAR race, which is at Texas Motor Speedway, so 300 miles west. The wind is a factor there, too.

Later in the summer, when the fields are no longer bare (hopefully crops will be growing) the dust will be much less noticeable.

It is interesting what is affected by the wind.

Proof Reading

2011-04-09T13:25:00.000-05:00

A long time ago, I discovered that I do not proof read well on a computer screen. I do not know what it is, but I just do not see mistakes as well on the screen, as I do on a hard copy. A friend of mine once told me it was because I learned to read on hard copy, and younger people who spend much more of their early years reading on a computer, do not have this difficulty.

I do not know.

I do know that I generally re-read my blog posts a couple of times before posting them. Even so, usually when I go back the next day to check the post, I find another mistake. Usually a very obvious mistake. Hmmmm. I try to be careful.

Companionable Silence

2011-04-09T13:18:00.001-05:00

I tend to be a quiet person, and have for all my life. I find that when I am sharing space with someone, I do not have the need to always carry on a conversation with them. I can sit quietly near someone, and not need to speak or visit with them (although I may talk to my self.) This is especially helpful when in a work setting that requires shared space.

My cats do not share companionable silence. They rarely both sit on the sofa with me at the same time. The same is true for the bed. Even rarer, will they share the sofa or bed when I am not there. Today, I saw them sitting close to each other. It was probably not for a very long period of time, less than minutes, but for just that time, they seemed to be sharing companionable silence. Or, I was experiencing wishful thinking.

The Eyes of God

2011-04-09T00:41:00.001-05:00

I have written before about the lessons regarding homelessness that Lisenby taught me. Some time ago, I was at the grocery store, and saw a women give a donation to a man standing outside the entrance. I had seen him there before, but sadly, to be honest, I did not see him in that unseeing way we ignore unpleasantness around us.

The next time I saw him, I, too gave him something.

I was driving home tonight, thinking about indulging in some seafood for dinner. I approached an intersection, and there was someone there with a sign needing help. I did not stop to consider his story or what he would do with my contribution, but I made one to him. I thought that if I could splurge on extavagant food for dinner, I could help someone who may not have the options I have for food, shelter, clothing and self care.

I think, when I do something like this, I look into the eyes of God. For years, there was a man who inhabited a corner near "the Strip" which was the only, restricted location in Lubbock County where people could buy packaged alcoholic beverages. This man had long stayed at the intersection he inhabited, long enough that he was there when I was married to Lisenby in the 1980's. And, Lisenby used to make a contribution to him regularly.

After we divorced, I did not, at first, but after a while, decided I could give him a contribution, and did, regularly. I planned for it, and if I knew I was going that way, and did not have cash, I would make sure I had some, taking change from my "piggy bank."

A colleague of mine once made the comment about how I was brave to talk to a homeless person. She has a very warm, kind heart, and would not demean a homeless person, nor reject the opportunity to help a homeless person. She is just very aware that there are hidden dangers out there.

I have decided that I can look at a homeless person directly, and when I do, I am looking into the Eyes of God.

Self Talk

2011-04-09T00:21:00.001-05:00

Do you know what self talk is? It is the internal messages we send and give to ourselves, about our selves, that impacts our self esteem, self worth, self image, and general self.

But in my way of thinking, it is more. It is also the gathering in of messages from other people, messages that we internalize to describe ourselves: What my boss says about me; what my lover says about me; what my family says about me; what my friends say about me. This internal messaging system helps to create our self image and helps to develop the person we become.

Many of us grow up with negative, or at best, neutral self talk: we are quick to hear about our mistakes, failures, how we disappoint people, what we have done wrong. When we do okay, average, mediocre or as expected, we seldom get positive feedback. We are fortunate when we are recognized for very good effort, accomplishments and activities.

But positive input and feedback are very important to who we are. With positive input, we develop confidence, the desire to achieve more, strive harder, stretch our comfort zones and try new things.

Some thirty years ago, I attended a workshop and learned that what I thought was positive self talk was not: we often give ourselves negative messages, thinking they are positive. For example, I start to have a conflict with someone, and I decide "it's not worth it." Well that is really negative self talk. What I can positively decide is that I am worth more than belittling myself by getting into a conflict with this person over a petty argument. Or, if the argument is over a power issue, I can decide that I am worth more than trying to prove my dominance over that person by behaving in a socially unacceptable way.

So, self talk can help us to behave in a more pro-social manner.

Additionally, it is important to remember that when we use self talk, the brain does not process the word "not." "Not" is not a concrete. The brain processes the concrete. So, if I say to myself "I am not going to overeat,", my brain processes the overeat part of the statement. This is weird, but true. So, if I want to eat less, my self talk needs to be "I eat small portions."

The example I use with my patients at work is a bowling example: I can stand at the bowling lane, and tell myself I want to throw a strike. I can do this one of several ways: I can tell myself I do not want to throw a gutter ball, but the likelihood of doing so is great. My mind is in the gutter. Or, I can tell myself I want to throw a strike, or throw the ball down the middle. The likelihood of success has just increased. I have taken my mind out of the gutter.

This is a very good graphic way to teach about negative self talk: we can have self talk that is in the gutter, or we can have self talk that is straight up the middle.

Beautiful nights

2011-04-08T23:56:00.000-05:00

This is the time of year that the nights on the South Plains are just beautiful... I spent the evening sitting outside, reading. I have, in the past, moved my computer outside, to write, or even watch a movie.

I moved inside to go to bed, then decided to work on the computer. Sheer laziness kept me from moving it outside, although I will admit, before I moved inside, I had had to find a jacket to wear, as the night air was cooling off.

Now, the house windows are open, and I am hoping the night air will cool off the inside of the house.

And, I still have things to work on before I go to sleep.

Cooling Down

2011-04-07T23:46:00.000-05:00

The weather has become summer warm, and controlling the temperature in the house at this time has become a bit of a gambit. It is really not warm enough for the air conditioner, especially with the over night temperatures reaching into the 30's sometimes. But the day time temperatures are sometimes in the 90's.

So, I am struggling with temperature control right now. In the evenings, after the sun has gone down, and the wind blowing the dust has laid, I can open the house to try to cool the temperature.

But, I am well aware of the crime rate in my neighborhood, and am concerned about easy access through windows.

So, I open windows where I can monitor them. The windows I have do have a lock feature, but that only allows 3-4 inches of air in. And, I do not trust the lock feature. So my open windows are open when I am up and alert, and can monitor them.

I am hoping to cool the house down tonight. What with the blowing air, and the ambient temperature, I may get some help.

Reading Crescendo

2011-04-07T23:08:00.000-05:00

I have mentioned more than once that I am a mystery book reader. I have noticed an interesting phenomenon to my reading habit in the last year or two. There are many mystery books that I really do not care about, but this also applies to the books that I am really enjoying:

As I get closer to the end, and the pieces are coming together, and the mystery is being solved, I find myself wanting to read faster and faster, and more and more, until I finish the book.

This is a bit of a change for me. Maybe it is the type of book I am reading, but there was a time in my past that I really enjoyed savoring a book, and spending time with the characters and plot, without being in a hurry to finish the book.

I am not sure when this change occurred, or why. Have you had either experience with books.

Being Off

2011-04-05T21:38:00.000-05:00

My schedule has changed this week, because the doctor is out, and we are not seeing patients for treatment team until he returns. I am still seeing patients. And, I have plenty of other work to do, including going to training.

But, I am off. I want it to be Wednesday night, not Tuesday. I am afraid that tomorrow I will be mis-aligned into thinking it is Thursday.

Maybe I can re-align myself.

Sake

2011-04-03T17:39:00.000-05:00

My cats are aging. Sake will be 10 this year, and Haiku is 9. That is not old for cats, but it is middle aged, I think.

I have noticed a difference in Sake. She is more hesitant when she jumps, and sometimes, does not do the seriously high or difficult jumps, after she thinks about them. This breaks my heart. But, so far, she does not seem to have injured herself by an ill-fated jump attempt.

The other thing that is happening, is that she is not as able to keep herself free of mats. She has always had trouble with her britches, and right now, they are really matted. I spend a very few minutes every day trying to work on those mats, but she is not very tolerant, and I understand that it is painful to have the fur pulled while I am trying to just cut out the mats.

Most recently, she has had severe mats under her chin that she does not seem to be able to tend to. I have worked on them regularly. She does not like that, but after the work is done, she seems to acquiesce that something needed to be done, anyway. I hate to hurt her, and try to be gentle, but know that mats are tough. I cut when I can. I comb softly when I can. I hope for the best.

Interestlngly, when I show her the fur, she seems to realize where it came from and she does seem to feel better when she does not have serious mats...

My Hair

2011-04-03T17:29:00.000-05:00

If you know me, you know that my personal appearance is not my top priority or concern, although I have to somewhat conform to the conventions of professionalism and try to present half way decently. But, really, I could care less.

And, working in a prison has reinforced this: we do not want to look alluring, attractive, even becoming. Frumpy is not frowned on, as long as we are neat and not unprofessional.

So, my hair has not been a crowning jewel for me, as it is for some women. For years, I wore my hair long and straight. I did not want anyone touching it, and had it trimmed on my infrequent trips to my mother's house some 2000 miles away.

After a while, that did not work, and I found I needed to have a more professional hair cut. So a friend recommended a hair dresser who I really bonded with, and who provided me with the type of blunt cut plain hair style I wanted.

Then, something strange happened. The hair on the back of my head started waving. And, after a while, the hair all over my head started waving. So, I have gone to a short, layered cut. I call it my "Meg Ryan" look, because she has short, stick out, wavy hair. Which is what my hair looks like.

I am no longer using the hair dresser I so liked. I am just using the Pro-Cuts a few blocks from my house, and whatever stylist that is available. They each put their own touch on my hair cut.

My most recent cut was very, very short. I ended up with bangs, if my hair dries over my forehead. If, like today, it does not, I have a cowlick or rooster tail above my forehead (yuck). The hair over my ears molds to cover my ears (and stick out over my ears.) But with this very short cut, there is little I can do to change or style my hair by combing or drying. Which is okay with me, but kind of strange. On the other hand, I really like just being able to run my hand through my hair and have it not change or do anything.

A Wind Advisory

2011-04-03T17:03:00.000-05:00

We are in, and have been consistently in, a hazardous weather situation: the South Plains are dry, and the winds are strong. Any small spark can ignite a fire and send it whipping along the plains.

We are blessed. I remember some years ago, when I spent time out in the country, seeing grass fires blowing through the fields. It was eerie: it looked like the flames were about 18 inches or so above the ground, and everything just burned in its path. There is nothing on the plains to stop these flames. I do not know how firefighters combat these grass fires. It would be phenomenal! And dangerous.

If you live on the South Plains, be careful about flames and fire: including cigarette butts, cooking fires, and hot equipment.

Vinca Lives

2011-04-03T16:57:00.000-05:00

I have a small grape arbor, and the grass underneath has died, due to the dense summer shade. I tried shade grass, but it was tedious, and I was not diligent enough to get it established. So last summer, I planted vinca, which is supposed to do okay in sun and shade. I had several hills of vinca come fall, but it did not do well with the extreme winter cold that we had. I should have covered it, and if we have a cold snap like that next year, I hope to remember to cover it.

However, there are several small (one or two sprouts) and some larger (3 or 4 sprouts) plants coming back. I purchased a few more to supplement, and will water and feed, hoping to help the vinca along.

The American Myth: The Cinderella Story

2011-04-02T22:05:00.001-05:00

It is March Madness, when the NCAA Basketball Tournament occurs. And, often, especially in the men's contest, we hear the term "The Cinderella Story" being applied to teams that are not well seeded in the tournament, but do well, anyway.

What is "the Cinderella Story" in sports? In this instance, it applies to a lesser ranked team making their way through the ranks of the tournament, win by win, to make it to the Final Four and more improbably, winning the national championship.

How often has this happened? Well, who knows, but there is surely a sports statistician out there with that information. This link just tells you about March Madness. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NCAA_Men%27s_Division_I_Basketball_Championship This link gives you some history about Cinderella Stories: http://www.kidzworld.com/article/25373-march-madness-the-cinderella-story.

Remember the University of Texas at El Paso team of 1966, which was the basis for the book and film "The Glory Road" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glory_Road_(film) This was a Cinderella Story deluxe, involving underdog and racial themes. Coach Haskins recruited many black players and brought his team to a national championship.

This year has been another year of Cinderella Story teams in the men's tournament. All of the number one seeded teams did not make it to the final four.

You can argue what that means, but ultimately, it means that when the chips are down, when push comes to shove, when the going gets tough, the tough get going, and teams not ranked number one show their dominance, if just for one game.

So, this brings me to think about "the Cinderella Story." Does it not bother you, sports fans, that the real Cinderella Story is about a woman? Sports announcers do not even have the decency to change it to "the Cinderfella Story" when they apply this term to the men's tournament.

What that says to me is that it is a wonderful, universally known term and men have usurped it for their own use, instead of allowing it to be used for the women who deserve their due.

So, come one guys, get politically correct, there are no "Cinderella Stories" in the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament.

The American Myth: Three Cheers for the Underdog

2011-04-02T21:38:00.002-05:00

On March 29, 2011, I was watching NCAA Elite Eight woman's basketball games, and found myself cheering, in the final game of the round, for Texas A&M against Baylor. Both teams are currently in the Big 12, and rivals of my "home team" Texas Tech. The season this year saw Texas Tech lose twice to Texas A&M and surprisingly, only once to Baylor. Texas Tech had an 11 point upset win over Baylor in Lubbock.

Well, there is something to be said for the American Myth about cheering for the underdog. And I tend to do that sometimes. Often. In the USA, we love "the Cinderella Story."

But for me, there was more that went into cheering for A&M than cheering for the underdog. Some of it had to do with the BAD HISTORY between Texas Tech and Baylor. Specifically, and most recently, the events of the the Texas Tech vs. Baylor game in Lubbock on March 3, 2010. Baylor "superstar" Brittany Griner punched Texas Tech player Jordan Barncastle and broke her nose. From the Texas Tech perspective, Ms. Griner was given a very mild punishment: she issued a written apology, but she also was given a 2 game suspension. A mere slap on the wrist.

But, even before that, there was the Kim Mulkey presence. Her style, her dress, her behavior. Her style is rough. Her dress is flamboyant, advertising all she has to offer as a coach. Her behavior reflects her style and dress: angry, aggressive, adversarial to the MAX.

On the other hand, Gary Blair, coach of the A&M team has a more collegial, generous style. Less aggressive. More complimentary of the opposition. He even approached Tech player, Kierra Mallard, after one of the Tech vs. A&M games and encouraged her to step up to the leadership role she really should be demonstrating as a junior player. How much more generous and gracious as a coach can you get.

So, when I am deciding on a team to cheer for, there are factors other than being the underdog, that influence my decision.

The First Time

2011-04-02T21:12:00.000-05:00

I am watching baseball tonight, and one of the announcers commented that one of the players did something that was a first in major league baseball. The announcer noted that it was unusual and exciting to have a first in major league baseball. When you think about it, that makes a lot of sense. The first professional teams were organized in 1871, and baseball is a much written about, much analyzed sport. So, when something new happens, after 140 years, it says something.

Jigging the Printer

2011-04-01T17:32:00.001-05:00

Okay, my printer/scanner/copier is getting old. I do not recall when I bought it, but I it may have been as long ago as 2001, or much later. I just do not know.

What I do know, is that every time I have to load a new color cartridge in the printer, I have to "jig" the printer. Although I now buy HP brand name cartridges (I have actually bought off brand cartridges, and that is when the trouble started), I have to go through all kinds of machinations to get the printer to work. I have to shut down the printer, unplug it, replug it, turn it back on, take the cartridge out, put it back in, take it out, shut off the printer, turn it back on, etc, etc, etc until finally, the printer decides I do not have a bad cartridge, and it will do the self test and alignment. I spent 45 minutes doing that today.

But success at last!

Women's College Basketball

2011-03-28T21:50:00.000-05:00

Last year, I was a women's college basketball fan. I watched the games and the championship, not faithfully, but with good interest. I watched games from other conferences, games from championships, and tournaments.

This year, I was a Lady Raider Basketball fan, and lost interest in the team as they faltered, and lost some games they should have won. True, they made it to the first round of the NCAA Tournament, but even then, they did not reprensent themselves well. There were too many games in which the team did not play as a team, nor show heart and determination to win. The NCAA tournament game was one such game. They have not learned how to be a team.

I missed a lot of the NCAA tournament, but am watching the Elite Eight, and will watch the final four and the championship game. There is a lot of reason to support women's college basketball. First of all, it is a statement of gaining equality. Let's face it, men's sports still outshine the women in publicity, importance, and available resources, although things are supposed to be equal.

Second, it says something about women being team members. Young women are only now being more and more socialized as team players. So, promoting a team sport like basketball says something about building women's team skills.

Third, the women coaches are so collegial. They have such a sense of comraderie and supportiveness notwithstanding their rivalries.

Fouth, women support women. Most notably, women's basketball places a heavy emphasis on supporting women's breast health. During the basketball season, there are any number of promotional activities to raise funds to help support breast cancer awareness and research. How much more supportive can women be of women?

Daylight Savings Time

2011-03-26T23:43:00.000-05:00

Most of us have little difficulty adjusting to standard time, when, in the autumn, we push the clock back an hour. It requires a little adjustment, but because it can be the occasion for an extra hour of sleep, it seems not to be a bad adjustment, usually.

Generally, I do not have much difficulty adjusting to daylight savings time. But this year, something is different. Of course, losing an hour of sleep can be a problem. But, part of the problem is that the weather has been so pleasant, that when I get home from work, I do not want to be inside. So, I am outside longer than I intend. But, when I finally do go inside, I still have projects to which to attend, some of which I can not work on outside. So, I expect to complete those projects, although I start later than I am used to doing.

Consequently, I am getting less sleep. I am feeling the effects of it. So much so, Friday at work was a very, very long day for me. And, I decided to change my plans for Saturday, to afford me extra rest. But, here it is, closing in on midnight, and I am still awake. I do not mind now, but it makes early rising difficult. And, I keep saying, maybe tomorrow night, I can get to bed early. I also know that if I can force the early rising, I will be able to get to sleep sooner at night, and get my schedule adjusted. It just takes some self discipline. Of which I am capable, but obviously not engaging in currently.

Expanding Your Limits

2011-03-26T23:30:00.001-05:00

Recently, I was asked to work on a knitting project for someone. The request included selecting a pattern which I had not worked on before, and which required me to expand my skills and capabilities as a knitter. Although I felt I was up to the task, I faced the project with some trepidation. However, it has gone much more smoothly than I had anticipated. I faced some blocks along the way, when I felt sure the project was not going to turn out as I had hoped. But, ultimately, it seems to have gone well. I am not done, I have a little more knitting to do. But what remains to be done is well within my skill level and past experience.

It is good to be challenged to expand one's limits and horizons. It helps to build self esteem. It helps to foster creativity. And it certainly can develop a sense of accomplishment. Additionally, if the experience is positive it can add to a sense of pleasure and even well being.

If the experience does not turn out so well, we can still use it as a positive learning experience. Perhaps it becomes a matter of knowing what we do not like, once we try something. Or, acknowledging what we learned, what we learned not to do, what we learned to do differently next time. Experience, positive or negative, is still growth and life expanding.

Hoping for A Storm

2011-03-19T01:39:00.000-05:00

It has been a dry spring. The weather predictors have suggested a possibility of 20% chance of rain. Tonight, the percentage was increased to 40%. We need the rain. There have been a plethora of grassfires throughout west Texas. There is a lot of dust in the air when the wind blows.

I am hoping for a storm this weekend. It would be nice to have the rain, and nice to have a lazy weekend.

Insomnia

2011-03-19T01:18:00.001-05:00

As per Merriam Webster Online:

Definition of INSOMNIA

: prolonged and usually abnormal inability to get enough sleep

— in·som·ni·ac \-nē-ˌak\ adjective or noun

I have spent various periods of my life suffering from insomnia. Usually it is manifested by an inability to fall asleep. Lately, my insomnia has been manifested by waking up about 4:30 AM. I doze after that, but have not been able to sleep soundly.

Most recently I have been dealing with feeling dragging during the day after not being able to sleep at night. I blame not adjusting to the time change, because the insomnia has been happening for several weeks, and the only change this past week was the time change.

I am tired tonight, but not ready for bed. Maybe, when I go, I can go to sleep and stay asleep. That would be a blessing.

Like many of our functions, sleep is a habit. Maybe I can change my habit by getting tired enough to sleep through and change my rising time.

The Paper Eater

2011-03-06T20:10:00.000-06:00

Haiku is the paper eater. She likes to scratch at the newspaper put under the litter pans or the food dishes. She likes to chew on the corners of papers that I have on my desk. She likes to chew on the corners of magazines and books.

Haiku loves envelopes. She likes the sharp corners, and also really likes to lick the glue and shred the flap.

Hence the name "The Paper Eater."

Prayer

2011-03-06T20:03:00.000-06:00

I am not officially involved in an organized religion. But I do believe in the power of prayer. I live in a part of the world where "The Power of Prayer" was part of a weekly newscast. People in the part of the world sometimes wear their religion on their sleeve (but are no more free of human failings as anywhere else in the world.)

But I do believe in the power of prayer. My niece told me to watch Shadowlands http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0108101/ for the comment by C S Lewis about prayer, that it does not change God, but it changes him (paraphrased).

We are facing serious budget cuts in the State of Texas, which may impact employment, including my own. A coworker told me she prays about it. I have found that my prayer regarding my own circumstances has allowed me to reach a certain equanimity about the situation.

Now, I realize, I need to pray for the recipients of government programs, that their well being will be considered and tended to during this time of budget cuts.

Midnight Marauders

2011-03-03T23:29:00.000-06:00

Who are your midnight maraudes? Who are the people, visions, visitors who enter into your dreams and steal your peace of mind restful sleep?

Are you one of the lucky ones who does not have a midngiht marauder? Or, are you one of us who have varying and multipe midnight marauders.

I am blessed. My midnight marauderrs are at worst, spiteful, but generally benign, nagging but not vicious.

But there are those whose midnight marauders are hateful, vicious, evil marauders. For many people, medication, counseling, working on changing of thinking, relaxation and meditation just does not seem to impact those midnight marauders.

God bless us all. Hopefully we can handle the midnight marauders.

The Comfort of Lullabies: "A Lullaby Story"

2011-03-03T23:15:00.000-06:00

I went to a baby shower tonight. A coworker is due to deliver a child in April. It is popular where I live to do such activities in restaurants: each participant is responsible for their meal, no one has to worry about housekeeping in anticipation of guests, and we can have or not have those silly games.

This was a really nice shower. The couple is one of those young but wise beyond their years couples that are so rare these days. The mother received a "quotations book" on her 18th birthday that she still treasures, so asked us to contribute to such a book for her son. There were a lot of wonderfully creative and thoughtful gifts.

The group gathered truly were folks who care for each other and enjoy each other's company. It was just nice.

The parents had a gift for each participant: A CD called "A Lullaby Story" which is a collection of lullaby songs. I am sitting here listening to it, and finding myself very comforted by the songs. That is what lullabies are all about. This couple included in this CD "Morning Has Broken" and "Good Morning" from "Singing In The Rain." Well, isn't that what lullabies are all about? Assurances that morning will come and when it does, there will be good things to encounter as the world awakens and we face a new day..

Of Course, I Am Tired

2011-03-01T21:52:00.000-06:00

Last night, I awoke about 3 AM after having a dream about dogs invading my old Victorian style house (I do not have an old Victorian style house). I could not get the dogs out, and I could not keep up with cleaning after them. My cats, some what miraculously, were safe. But the dogs were hell bent on destruction.

I actually have an idea about the message that this dream was sending to me. It is a recurrent theme, and one upon which I will have to take action soon. And should have taken action sooner. Dreams are amazing.

What Can You Do?

2011-03-01T21:46:00.001-06:00

Each of us has some skill, talent or qualification that enables and allows us to contribute to our community. The question is: "What Can You Do?"

We frequently think of political activism as protest, politicking, campaigning. Well, it can also be helping people to get out to vote. Encouraging people to just be more aware of the issues. Encouraging people to contact their legislators on the local, county, state and federal level, especially regarding a specific issue. Encouraging people to help in parts of the community that are undeserved. Attending minority celebrations, activities and ceremonies. The latter can be solidarity building and uplifting!

Through our churches,religious and community organizations we can be involved in activities that help the poor, homeless, poverty stricken, downtrodden.

There are organizations that embrace our physical talents and help to build and repair homes and community facilities to the benefit of all.

There are a multiplicity of civic, service and community organizations who work to help to provide support, sustenance and assistance to the community. Some are local. Some are local branches or chapters of national or international organizations.

There are organizations that help to foster children, in their home environments, or institutional environments. Organizations help to protect childrens' rights, and advocate for their well being.

There are organizations that seek to protect and defend the well being of developmentally challenged individuals of all ages. And organizations to help to protect minorities, however minorities are defined: race, creed, color, gender, sexual orientation, religion, ethnic background or what have you.

There are organizations that seek to protect pets, other animals, wildlife, the environment.

There are so many options for helping to improve our society, that the question is not "What Can You Do" but "What Will You Do, and What Will It Be, and When Will You Do It?"

Not for Profit Board of Directors

2011-03-01T21:25:00.000-06:00

Recently, I was honored with an invitation to join the board of directors of a not for profit Christian social service agency where I had worked years ago. Just being invited was an honor, and to be elected to the board, a blessing.

My term began in January, and I have been to 2 board meetings. I am feeling a bit of a "fifth wheel" because I am not sure where I fit or belong. I know about meeting participation. I went on line and found some readings about being on not for profit boards. I recall, when I worked for this same agency, years ago, a beloved board member embraced the members and was very caring about them. He set a standard maybe I can achieve?

I was excited tonight to receive a phone call regarding setting up a new member orientation. The agency has a new director, as of January, so my thought was to let her get settled in, but if by March, new board member orientation did not occur, I would invite myself to the agency and orient myself.

I am truly blessed and honored to serve as a board member for this not for profit. I hope I am up to the task.

The News is Depressing

2011-03-01T21:16:00.000-06:00

I am reminded tonight why I do not watch a lot of news shows on TV, or the semi-news shows. Tonight, for an hour, I watched a show on PBS about for profit universities. This may not be the exact link to the show, but you will get the drift: http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/collegeinc/view/.

It was really depressing. Although the for profits offer opportunities, they offer the pitfalls of higher education at much greater the price than public education. And there was indication that their recruiters are under even higher pressure than the pressure placed on government or religious based institutes of higher education recruiters. And, they may not be above board about their outcomes and accreditation. So people who use them may not obtain the results that they were lead to believe they would obtain.

This did not surprise me. I think I am discerning enough to recognize that for profit education runs some risks, and while I may not have stated all of them, intuitively, these are some of the risks that I would have expected.

The sad part about this story is that it is a story of people who are honestly and earnestly trying to better themselves so they can enter into the job market, develop a career, make something of themselves, and otherwise improve their lot in life. And the scamsters may or may not be taking advantage of them, and their desperation, but it is a fine line. And, as with any fine line, many will cross either way.

Signs

2011-02-25T22:25:00.000-06:00

Do you believe in signs. I am not talking about superstitions. I am talking about signs or signals that alert us to something. That turn us in a specific direction. That make us aware of things.

Well, this week, I received two signs that told me the same thing. Something I have been receiving signs for throughout a long time. Maybe it is time to take the plunge.

Where Does Your Gratitude Lay?

2011-02-24T21:36:00.002-06:00

Where does your gratitude lay? I am so thankful. There are so many things for which I am grateful: I have a good job, with really fine co-workers, supervisors, and a meaningful mission.

I have a home. I have people who care about me: family, friends, colleagues.

I have a relatively safe environment in which to live.

I have pets who offer me companionship and pleasure.

I have a variety of social and interest activities in which I engage.

I enjoy learning.

I have relatively good health, although my age has slowed me down some.

I live in a country in which my well being and safety is protected as well as can be. The threat of revolt, uprising, violence is minimal at this time.

I live in an age in which technology has improved our lives, made our lives safer, and opened up the world to us.

I have faith that God is good, takes good care of me and my fellow man, and blesses me in my daily life.

Severe Weather

2011-02-24T20:55:00.001-06:00

This has been a time of severe weather. Across various parts of the nation, during various times since the winter season started last fall, there have been a myriad of crippling and damaging snow storms. The storm that affected Lubbock a few weeks ago spread from Arizona to the New England states. Its breadth was amazing.

Tonight, the midsection of the country is experiencing severe thunderstorms with possible tornadoes. The end of February is a little early to see this kind of activity, but obviously very possible.

Lubbock had some severe winds lately. Including today, the dust was up.

This coming weekend, the Science Spectrum in Lubbock http://www.sciencespectrum.org/new/publicevents.shtml is hosting Severe Weather Awareness Day. I went last year. There was a presentation about storm chasing, and a tour of the National Weather Service offices, which are in the same building as the Science Spectrum. This year, there is an OMNI presentation of the film Storm Chasers.

Maybe this is an activity that will interest you. Being aware of and prepared for severe weather, whether it is snow, ice, wind, thunderstorms, tornadoes, hurricanes, cold, heat, floods will help you to better survive it.

If you do not have a severe weather radio, it is a very good idea to get one. http://www.weatherradiostore.com/?s=g&kw=noaa+weather+radios&gclid=CJTQuNqmoqcCFUpj7AodgXIzEg.

Take Over

2011-02-24T20:41:00.000-06:00

I have a nice office chair to use at my computer desk. A very long time ago, Haiku commandeered the chair, so I have set up a folding chair for me.

More recently, I have set up a folding TV tray next to the chair, for paperwork, or if I am eating a meal at the computer. Well, the girls have commandeered that as their place to sit while I am working on the computer.

Cats are insidious. They just take over whatever space they want.

Shut the TV Off and Write

2011-02-23T20:53:00.000-06:00

Last night, I shut off the TV because there was absolutely nothing I wanted to watch. I was working on a computer project, but as I was doing that, I had some ideas about which I could blog...So, it came to me. Shut off the television. That will allow ideas, about which you can write, to enter your brain. Wow.

Compassion Fatigue

2011-02-23T20:43:00.005-06:00

I work in a psychiatric prison. I see lots of brutal behavior by patients, self-injurious, and assaultive. I hear stories of people who have lived in horrendously violent, inhumane, abusive environments. I hear about horribly violent crimes.

I think I may be susceptible to compassion fatigue. But, I hope I have an antidote. I am able to spend time with my patients offering them hope, positive coping skills, and new ways of thinking about dealing with their lives.

However, sometimes I wonder just what kind of toll this work has taken on on me. There are times when I go home and do not want to have to deal with any reality... I just want to veg out. So, those times, I know I am suffering compassion fatigue.

I have various social outlets that are planned and take me out of that fugue. That is important. I need to interact with common, regular or normal people so I feel the normalcy of life.

Hopefully, I am working on not suffering from compassion fatigue

Learning from the Past

2011-02-20T19:26:00.000-06:00

This past week, the book group discussed The Postmistress by Sarah Blake. There were many different themes in the book, but one was that two of the three main female characters violated their work ethics due to very extra-ordinary circumstances, precipitated by war. One of the characters in the book said "Pay attention." Well, this leads me to think that we do NOT pay attention, We do not learn from our past, and we repeat our mistakes over and over again. And many of our mistakes precipitate war, or prolong war. What is wrong with us?